My Favorite Little People

These two. 

We are in a good season of life around here.  I find myself stopping at several points throughout the day thinking these, these are the days that I will look back on as the good old days. I have prayed hard for specific things that I have seen the Lord hear my pleas and answer in ways that leave me thankful and even astounded.  

I have seen my husband take a big risk with his career - and the Lord has brought us from a place of fear to a place of trust in His Provision.  I trusted His direction when He tapped my heart to homeschool her. 

Not knowing what in the world I was getting myself into, I have experienced joy like never before during these days of homeschooling.  I have seen my daughter's insecurities and sometimes strong-willed temperament morph into a more confident, gentle, and cheerful child.  I have seen her develop a love of learning coupled with a sweetness that is present even more so than before.  She is one of my favorite people to be with. 

McClain.  His "boyishness" is in full force and he brings a smile to my face every single day.  

He is still a sweet, sweet boy.  Even the teachers at preschool who don't have him in their class tell me what a sweet boy he is.  Along with that sweetness, is a wild, crazy, hilarious, mischievous little boy.  

After being at the park with friends one afternoon, where imaginary camping trips and bug hunts took place, I asked McClain to tell Suggie what bug he found on the tree.  He thought for a moment and said "a praying baptist." {a praying mantis} 

McClain is obsessed with all things superhero - Spiderman, Batman, Captain America - you name it, he loves it.  

 He loves his toy guns, swords, "body-slamming" Daddy, playing "big, bad wolf" with Sis, riding his scooter outside, picking up any critter he can get his hands on - ants, lizards, worms.  In a technology driven society, he would easily play with daddy's iPad  or watch movies all day if we'd let him so we have to majorly limit technology with this one.  He loves to discover things and build things - forts, lego towers, puzzles, bow and arrows.  One day he excitedly called me into the living room where a tall tower of legos was standing.  Beaming he told me it was the Tower of Babel. 

In McClain's preschool class this year there are a lot of little girls, opposed to his class last year that only had two girls and the rest wild, active boys.  There is a precious girl, Emily, who has down syndrome in there as well.  On the first day of school I talked to McClain about being a gentleman, and that there were a lot of girls in his class that he needed to treat with kindness.  I warned him against teasing and to protect the girls in his class.  Later that morning when he got in my car, he said "Mama, you'd be so proud of me.  I was kind to all the girls.  I was their hero.  Yep,  I saved the day."  Bless him. 

PopPop recently got a new puppy, Sam.  The children love torchering picking up, carrying around, chasing,  and wrestling Sammy dog. 

Lucy Mills has completely taken to tennis recently.  She has lessons with Coach Brandon every Monday afternoon, along with five other friends.  She is doing great with it.  Several times a week she takes her racket and bag of tennis balls to hit them against the garage.  Her perfectionist tendencies definitely get the better of her sometimes, but she works hard and takes instructions well.  This has been a fun sport for her and she looks forward to each practice. 

Every Thursday at our Classical Conversations school, Lucy Mills and the children in her class have to give a presentation in front of the other mothers and students.  It just lasts a few minutes and the topic changes week to week.  It's a great way to get them comfortable speaking in front of a crowd.  One week the students had to talk about what they want to be when they grow up.  Lucy Mills and I usually practice what she will present on a few times before Thursday's class rolls around.  When I asked her what she wanted to present on she said "I want to be a mama when I grow up." My heart was touched but I immediately gave her other suggestions - what about being a teacher, a doctor, a veterinarian, an artist? Nope her mind was settled.  Tears came to my eyes when she stood before her class that morning as she shared that when she was grows up she wanted to be a mother.  Mamas take care of their babies, and make them applesauce, and play outside with them, read books to them, teach them schoolwork when they turn five. And mamas sing songs and prayers to them at bedtime. I can't wait to be a mommy she said.  I'll either have one baby or 100 babies.  Thank you Lord.  It's all worth it for a moment like that. 

My little man takes my hand in his, kisses the back of it and then those brown eyes flash up to meet mine.  He tells me I just really love you Mommy. 

Lucy Mills adores animals and babies.  If there is a dog or cat around chances are she is petting it or trying to hold it.  Same thing for babies.  She has started referring to Maggie Mae as her baby.   She pushes Maggie in the stroller and has started carrying her around on her hip all.the.time.  I love seeing this little mama in action. 

Who knew that among the constant demands of motherhood that these precious children would end up being some of my closest companions?  While we are still very much in training mode, it's a blessing to enjoy being with them and experiencing life alongside them. 

May Happenings

May brought my third year celebrating being a mother on Mother's Day.  My cup runneth over. 

I am thankful to have been chosen to be Lucy Mills and McClain's mom.  Thankful to have a wonderful mom, mother in law, and aunt who selflessly give of themselves to help me in this divine calling.  I don't take it lightly nor do I take it for granted.  The bond I have with these kiddos is deep.

I was invited to a Mother's Day luncheon at Lucy Mills' preschool.  I was the first mom to arrive and I'll never forget how her eyes lit up when she saw me.  Even though her expression here would tell you otherwise ;) 

For weeks she kept talking about the pink jewelry box she was making for me.  It has pretty diamonds on it with treats inside, she said,  but shhhh... Mama it's a surprise.  

The treasure I loved the most was the card she made for me.

We enjoyed a sweet time together eating lunch and then showing off her art work.  

And her friend, Bryan.

Loved the special blessing they prayed for the mommies. 

May also brought a month of fun visitors.  My best friend from Columbia College was passing through town and stopped to see us.  The last time she was here our babies, were well uh, babies.  Click here to see the pictures.  Well some time has passed and during this visit our kiddos loved playing together.  Right before Amanda arrived, I told Lucy Mills that Mrs. Amanda and her little girl, Sophie, were coming over to play.  Since Sophie is also the name of Aunt Tutu's puppy dog, Lucy Mills had a puzzled look on her face and asked Mama, is Sophie a little girl or a dog?! 

McClain wasted no time taking Sophie for a spin in his wheels.

Amanda and I had fun catching up and reminiscing about our college days, all the while our children were laughing and having a ball together.



Uncle Daniel and Aunt Rachel came to visit us also.  I really do wish they lived down the street from us.  The children adore them and we enjoyed being together and hearing about the new church plant they are doing.



Lucy Mills even remembered to wear her "special bracelet" Rachel gave her from the wedding.



The children got extra love and attention that weekend because Aunt Tutu also came for a visit.



She cooked us a delicious dinner and spent time loving on our littles.  Tutu, please come back!



My children are beyond blessed with people who love and adore them.  Not only our family, but sweet friends as well.  The friendships made in childhood are a beautiful thing.  Innocent, pure, and true.

I know this firsthand.  The mother of the two girls below was my best friend in preschool.   

And look how that relationship has come full circle.  Actually the mamas of all these sweet ones are gifts in my life and in the lives of my family.

Blessed.  

Tea Time

When she woke up from her nap today I told her that a special surprise awaited her.  Angelina wanted to have tea and cookies with my sweet girl.  She was thrilled. 

My parenting got a big, fat fail earlier in the day.  I allowed my fustration, my weariness, my sinfulness to cloud what my expectations of my children should be. 

When I was a teenager and used to babysit other people's children, motherhood didn't look so hard.  Dare I say it even looked e-a-s-y.  Well sure, Lil, when you show up at the end of the day, serve a meal someone else prepared, slap some clean pj's on the kiddos, read a book or two to put them to sleep all before retiring on the couch to enjoy their flat screen, it is! 

In fact, this gig takes constant training along with a dose of humble pie to realize that I don't have it all figured out.

By His grace though, I know the One who does.  I know the One who knit these babies together from the beginning.  I know that He calls this duty a privilege, not a waste. 

On my refrigerator are these wise and encouraging words...
Today, I will pray to speak words that are only strong words, words that make these children feel strong.  Grace words.  Grace is the only non-toxic air.  All other words I breathe are death words.

Today I will pray to be consistently consistent.  I will create safe rhythms that our children find security in.

Today, when I feel most repelled by a child's behavior, that is the sign I need to draw the very closest to that child. 

Today, my priorities will be all Things Unseen.  

Today, I will laugh!  And I will let the little children laugh!  I will create a culture of joy! - Ann Voskamp

I'm in love...

with these precious children.

Tender moments make the journey so very sweet. 

23 Months

We have officially entered your birthday month sweet girl and the countdown to "2" is on. Lately I have found myself thinking back to the when you were born and the days that followed.  I think it's safe to say that those were the sweetest of all my days.  My entire life I wanted nothing more than to be a mom, to have at least one little girl, and to name her after my mom.  


I remember when I first laid eyes on you.  It was as if an angel just entered the room.  Magical really. 
I remember that I never loved your daddy more than when I saw the love and protection he showed towards you.


You stayed in the Special Care Nursery for six days.  In the midst of the monitors chirping, the alarms ringing, and the wires surrounding you, there was a peace that abounded that I had never felt before.  Your daddy and I would race down that hospital hallway to see you, rock you, feed you, and just soak up every minute with our brand new bundle.  Even when I was discharged and sent home without you, we would set our alarm clocks for 4:30am to be back in time for the 5am feeding. 


Lucy Mills Mason, you are a delight.  While motherhood is not easy or perfect, it comes with messes and mistakes,  and it leaves me feeling more physically and emotionally exhausted than I ever thought possible, I would not trade it for the world.  When you give me a hug, kiss, squeeze, or say I love you Mama I thank God for placing us together as mommy and daughter.  When I see you rock Babydoll back and forth while singing your high pitched, but precious version of Jesus Loves Me, I can't help but think about what an amazing journey the last 23 months have been.  

It's Worth It

His eyes softly close and his little body finds comfort snuggled against my chest.  Moments earlier he was fighting sleep, and now all 12 pounds of him cradled in my arms has found rest.  Hopefully until the morning. 
His sister has never liked being rocked to sleep, but he wants nothing more.  So I rock him.  I rock him and hold him close and think about what a blessing his little life is to us.  As exhausted as I am and as much as my own bed beckons me, I can not bring myself to leave this moment.  My sleep can wait.  This is worth it.

Earlier in the day, the constant "hey mama," and "mama, hold" from my first born makes me wonder how anything around the house will get done.  Doesn't she know there are floors to clean, laundry to fold, food to be cooked, and emails to be returned? 
No.  She does not.  
All she knows is she wants her mother's undivided attention.  So I sit down on the floor, she crawls in my lap, and I give it to her.  
My to do list can wait.  She is worth it.  This is worth it.

"Maybe I will never sleep past 7:00 in the morning and maybe I will never have time to brush my hair and maybe I will never be able to eat a full meal without getting up and down a million times.  It’s worth it.  Maybe it will always take me twice as long to do everything and maybe I will never have a really clean house and maybe my days of staying out late with friends are over.  It’s worth it.  Anything I have to give up is worth just that one minute when they look at me and call me, “Mama,” when those little hands grab mine and those big eyes look at me as if I hold the keys to the world.  It’s worth it." -Katie Davis

Motherhood has taught me that my life is not my own.  And you know what...it's worth it. I have gained so much more than I have to give up.  These precious children are worth it.

Kisses From Katie

Back in the fall my friend Mary Catherine mentioned an inspirational blog that she had stumbled upon, and I happen to find an article about it this morning. I like to read interesting things about motherhood and family life, but this particular story can bless anyone. Just when I start feeling sorry for myself about being up all night on my birthday with a husband who has the stomach bug and a baby with RSV, the Lord reminds me that motherhood is a divine calling that demands selflessness. Here is the story of Katie Davis.

"It is my 16th Birthday and I am eating sushi at my favorite restaurant with my parents when I tell them that I would like to explore the possibility of taking a year in between high school and college to do mission work. This is unheard of in my family and they say they are not sure and will think about it. I am nervous, but somehow I know it is right. He changes their hearts.

I have just turned 18 and find an orphanage online. I beg my parents to let me visit over break, just three weeks. A month later I am on a plane. I am so excited. I am so scared, but I know He is going with me. I fall in love.

I graduate high school having made the commitment to teach Kindergarten for a year at a school in The Middle of Nowhere, Uganda. In August I get on the plane. I'm apprehensive and I cry most of the way because I miss my Mommy and my boyfriend. I am eager, but so uncertain. I trust Him. I teach 138 children how to speak English and to love Jesus.

It is October and I am just not sure I can do it anymore. I live in the smallest room I have ever seen in the back of a pastor's house. I am more uncomfortable than I had bargained for. No one understands, not people here, not people at home. I am tired. But I am prideful and I am not going to quit. I don't like this. But I know He has a plan. I learn, I grow, He is there.

It is December and God has spoken very clearly about opening a ministry that sponsors 40 of the orphaned children in the village where I am working. This involves moving into a different house, ALONE. It is big and I cannot imagine how God will fill it up. I am lonely and I am anxious. But I am still trusting. He fills the house, and we now have 400 children sponsored.

It is January and I am looking at a little girl, crushed under a brick wall with no one to care for her or her younger siblings. I offer to take the three home with me until we find them a better placement. I am not really sure what to do with them, but I know they are God's children. They stay.

It is three days later and the littlest looks at me and calls me mommy. My heart might break in two. Something clicks. I am even more scared than I was the day I stepped on that plane, but I KNOW. Today I have 13.

I have to deliver a baby, give a boy stitches, pull a tooth, give an injection. I'm petrified. But no one will do it if I do not. He is present, He holds my hand, they are all fine.

It is August and I must get on a plane back to America to go to college, as I have promised my father. I do not remember how to be a teenager or what it is to be normal in Brentwood, Tennessee. I will have to leave my babies. I will have to make new friends. I am sad and I am terrified. He wraps His arms around me. He puts just the right people in just the right places, and they help me and they make me feel at home.

First semester is over and He speaks clearly to me that I cannot serve two masters. "Go HOME," He says, "and stay." I am uncertain, but I want to be obedient. He squeezes tighter. I am thankful.

I have to look at my loving parents who have given me everything and tell them that I will not go to college right now, because I feel God wants me to be in Uganda. I know how disappointed and how angry they will be. I am more scared than I was when I got on the plane and more scared than I was when I took my first children. But I know that this IS the Plan. They love me anyway.

It is February and my "daughter's" biological father comes to take her away. My heart breaks in half, and I am not sure I will ever be able to get out of my bed again, let alone foster another child. I am more than devastated, but I want what is best for her, what He wants for her. She comes back and her biological father learns about Jesus.

It is March and a lame little girl is brought to my gate. She is undoubtedly mine, but I am still anxious. What if I can't do it? I don't know what to do with a special needs child, especially as my 13th child. I am criticized and ridiculed. I wonder. I trust and praise God for her sweet little life. She starts to walk.

I find myself in a village full of starving people that for some reason seem to want to kill me. God says to serve them anyway. I am not sure how it is going to work, or if it is safe. I can't figure it out, but I know He can. 1,200 Karamajongs, the poorest of Uganda's poor, are now served hot meals daily.

We keep taking in more children until there are 400 in our program. There is no way we will raise enough funds, but by now I have stopped worrying. He has always provided. Blessings rain from the sky, and all 400 children go to school.

I am 20 years old and have 13 children of my own and 400 more who all depend on me for their care. They are all learning to love Jesus and be responsible adults and looking up to me. The reality of it all can be a bit overwhelming at times. However, it is always pure joy.

There is a common misconception that I am courageous. I will be the first to tell you that this is not actually true. Most of the time, I am not brave. I just believe in a God who will use me even though I am not. Most mornings, before I even get out of bed I am overwhelmed with His goodness, with His plan for my life; I stand in awe of the fact that He could entrust me with so much. Most days, I don't have much of a plan. I don't always know where this is going. I can't see the end of the road, but here is the great part: Courage is not about knowing the path. It is about taking the first step. It is about Peter, getting out of the boat. I do not know my five-year plan; even tomorrow will probably not go as I have planned. I am thrilled and I am terrified, in a good way. So some call it courage, some call it foolish, I call it FAITH. I choose to get out of the boat. To take the next step. Sometimes I walk straight into His arms. More often, I get scared and look down and stumble. Sometimes I almost completely drown. And through it all, He never lets go of my hand."

To learn more about Katie Davis, visit her blog, Kisses from Katie.

Or make a donation to Katie's mission:

Amazima Ministries International 1694 Autumn Place Brentwood, TN 37027